Dearest Friends:
My children came to hear me speak at the Young Living Convention. Whereas my daughters have seen me lecture many times in the university classroom, and Chelsey enrolled in a Stress Management class I taught at Utah State University, my son, Colby, has never seen me in front of a crowd. It was hard for him to believe that mom did such things; thus, the first thing he wanted to know was, “Weren’t you nervous? What were you thinking before you stepped out on that stage?” Because he asked, I needed to be honest. Thus, I said, “Before I stepped out on the stage, I was in prayer. I said an aspiration prayer that the information I gave would be of benefit to all sentient beings so that hopefully, their suffering would be less.” The smile left Colby’s face. Then I said, “I wasn’t nervous because I wasn’t thinking about me. It wasn’t about me.”
I find more and more every day that not much is about me any more. The week before, I was helping a realtor by keeping a key to some of the condos that are for sale in my building. One day I not only had the key to Gwyn's unit but I met a realtor and prospective buyer at the front door and accompanied them to her unit. I took over. The realtor hardly said a word. I showed the buyer the unit, gave her a tour of the entire building, and took her back to the unit, even though the realtor said that they had another appointment. To my amazement, the buyer decided that she wanted to purchase Gwyn’s unit. I couldn’t believe it. I called my son, who is a realtor, and told him that I had just sold a condo--that I had no idea I could do such a thing. “Gosh, maybe I should have a real estate license”, I said. But, later that night, I discovered that during that time, Gwyn was on an airplane in prayer that her condo would sell within two weeks because her husband had accepted a job offer in Atlanta, Georgia. Thus, what had really transpired was that I was merely an instrument in the execution of a Divine Plan, and it wasn’t about me at all.
Our Reiki community will certainly miss Gwyn, who became one of my Reiki Masters last January. You can feel her spiritual strength in her best selling novels, which can be found at www.ebonisnoe.com, and the next time you’re at my condo, check out her magnificent tree that is now in my bedroom. I waited until Gwyn had left Utah to leave her binder about condo policies and procedures in what I knew would be an empty unit. I placed it on the fireplace mantel. I walked around and made a mental note of all the things I had appreciated: her spiritual statues, her picture of Sai Baba in the hallway, her altar in the bedroom. With every mental note, I also noted that they were gone. They had disappeared like a flash just as she was now gone in a flash on her way to Atlanta. It was another exercise in impermanence but a practice that I have incorporated into my daily life. When we recognize the impermanence of extrinsic phenomenon we also recognize that loss and suffering are impermanent. Just last week a couple sat in my living room for four hours, and the one message I got across to them was that their suffering, which they felt was permanent—was, in fact, impermanent, and they would one day look back on their current situation as a blink in time. It was that thought, I believe, that triggered an A-HA moment that gave them a reframed perspective and thus, some renewed strength.
I’m beginning to believe that there is a rite of passage before one becomes a healer, and that rite of passage is suffering. It really is analogous to seeing a beautiful lotus flower emerge and transform into the light from a dark and murky place.
Next month I travel to San Diego for a week to attune new Masters and spend time with my Lama Ole and his wife, Hannah. Reiki Master Bonnie Horrigan is so gracious in inviting me to stay in her wonderful home---among the shamans of old.
Thank you for the work you do in raising the vibration of this planet and in helping others to heal. Although I only mentioned a few people in our Reiki community, all of you are equally special, and all of you are an inspiration. I will continue to hold healing circle in Salt Lake City on the second Sunday of every month at 3:30 but I will not send email reminders. I trust that if you need to be here--for whatever reason—to share, inspire, rejuvenate, or heal--the Universe will direct. Remember to check my website at www.carolwilson.org for current class schedules.
Boundless Love and Light,
Carol
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